一、个性签名短句沙雕英文？
1、 I just want someone who will understand me even when no words are spoken 我希望有一个人会懂我，即使我什么都没说。
2、 Hate missing, and a smile and min 恨不知所踪，一笑而泯。
3、 This is who I am Nobody said you had to like it 这就是我。没人说非要你喜欢。
4、 The minute you think of giving up, think of the reason why you held on so long 在你想要放弃的那一刻，想想为什么当初坚持走到了这里。
5、 The same love that makes me laugh also makes me cry 同一份爱既让我笑又让我哭。
6、 If you know who I was, maybe you would forgive who I am 你如果认识从前的我，也许你会原谅现在的我。
7、 Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none 爱所有人，信任少数人，不负任何人。
8、 Don t wait The time will never be just right 不要再等待，现在就是行动的最佳时刻。
9、 I will always love, even if you are not 我会一直爱，就算你不在
10、 I love a happy ending, for they are so rare 我喜欢完美收尾，因为它们如此难得。
11、 Just because you re breathing, doesn t mean you re alive 你只是呼吸着，不代表你还鲜明地活着。
12、 True love from the heart not the mouth 真正的爱来自心脏不是口腔
13、 Just because it didn t last forever, doesn t mean it wasn t worth it 只因为它不会天长地久，不代表它就不值得。
14、 I am not what happened to me, I am what I chose to become 已经注定的不是我自己，我选择的才是我要成为的自己。
15、 When people treat you like nothing, you begin to feel like nothing 当别人不把你当回事的时候，自己也会开始变得不自信。
16、 I really want to talk to you, but I feel like I m annoying you 真的好想跟你讲话，但又很怕你嫌我烦
17、 Yesterday is history Tomorrow is a mystery But today is a gift 昨日已逝，明天尚远，今天才是老天赐予的礼物
18、 We were like strangers who knew each other very well 我们就像最熟悉的陌生人。
19、 Smile It irritates those who wish to destroy you 保持微笑，这会令那些痛恨你的人感到恼怒。
20、 The most regretful things are the uncompleted ones 最遗憾的事是那些还未完成的。
英文qq搞笑个性签名笑死人句子
1、 Don't give up Fight for what you love 别放弃，为你所爱的而奋斗。
2、 When think about our past, I lose my mind 一想到我们的过去，我就无法自持。
3、 It s the people who love you you re the hardest on 对那些爱你的人，你恰恰是最苛刻。
4、 When you have nothing to lose,it s time to gain 当你再也没有什么可以失去的时候，就是你开始得到的时候。
5、 Some people care too much I think it s called love 有些人太过在乎，我觉得那应该叫爱。
6、 And what if I lose everything? You ll still have me 要是我一无所有了呢?-那你还有我。
7、 Don't let the past and useless details ruin your existence 别让过去和那些无用的细节毁了你的现在。
8、 From youth to careful is a thin cool process 从少不更事到心思缜密是一个薄凉的过程
9、 Life always gives you another chance, it s called tomorrow 生活总会给你另一个机会，这个机会叫明天。
10、 If you want to understand today , you have to search yesterday 想要懂得今天，就必须研究昨天。
11、 I'm sick of saying sorry when I'm not 我厌倦了总是说对不起，即使我什么也没有做错。
12、 If you love me, do not leave me easily 若爱我就不要轻易离开我
13、 Everyone seems normal until you get to know them 每个人看上去都很平凡，直到你试着去了解他们之后。
14、 Every single thing you do, right now, affects your future 现在你所做的每件小事，都会影响到你的未来。
15、 Every story has an end, but in life every end is a new beginning 每个故事都有个结局，但生活中每个结局都是开始。
16、 Love is not a matter of counting the days It's making the days count 爱情不是数着日子过去，它让每个日子都变得有意义。
17、 The worst feeling is no more than wondering whether to wait or give up 最糟糕的感觉，莫过于不知道应该等待还是放弃。
18、 Please don t give up trying to do what you really want to do 请不要放弃尝试你真正想做的事。
19、 The people with the biggest hearts always suffer the most 心胸最宽大的人往往承受得最多。
20、 Strange place has a familiar street 陌生的地方有一个熟悉的街道
英文qq搞笑个性签名笑死人精选
1、 Brave to pursue my own want happiness勇敢的去追求自己想要的幸福。
2、 Mean, is the fate of the choice you rather than other situation命运的意思是，是处境选择你而不是其他。
3、 just don't want to lose my smile left with pride没心没肺地笑 只是不想输掉仅剩下的骄傲
4、 Think of you every day, your company, happiness is so natural想你的每一天，都有你陪伴，幸福是那么的自然 。
5、 Love is a kind of chance encounter, and one can neither waiting nor preparing for it爱是一种遇见，不能等待，也不能准备。
6、 Whatever with the past has gone, the best is always yet to come无论过去发生什么，最好的尚未到来。
7、 Look forward with hope, not backwards with regret 带着希望向前看，而不是带着悔恨退缩。
8、 Island is a marine wound to diffuse over coverage 岛是海洋想漫过来覆盖的伤。
9、 Pain is temporary, love is forever, don't make it the other way around 痛苦是暂时的，爱是永恒的，不要颠倒了彼此。
10、 Don t cry over someone who would not cry over you 不会为你哭的人，不值得你为之掉眼泪。
二、英美搞笑段子？
1、I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best. 我的品味最简单了，我总是对最好的感到满意 注：前一句好像在说自己对品味要求不高 2、If yu lve smething set it free, but dn't be surprised if it cmes back with herpes.”
如果你爱某人，就给他自由，但是如果他患了疱疹回来，你不要吃惊 3、Wisdm cmes frm experience. Experience is ften a result f lack f wisdm. 智慧来自经验，经验常常是缺少智慧的结果
三、搞笑句子简短英文？
1、我只为人民币服务，谢谢。
I just for the service, thank you. 2、我喜欢的人，都在硬盘里。
I like of the person, all in the hard disk.
3、人又不聪明，还学人家秃顶！ People don't clever, also learn bald!
4、走自己的路，让别人打车去吧！Walk yourself's road, let others take a taxi.
四、英国幽默短句？
幽默的英语句子
1、 Money is not everything. There‘s Mastercard & Visa.
钞票不是万能的，有时还需要信用卡。
2、 One should love animals. They are so tasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物，因为它们很好吃。 3)Save water. Shower with your girlfriend.
要节约用水，尽量和女友一起洗澡。
4、Love the neighbor. But don‘t get caught.
要用心去爱你的邻居，不过不要让她的老公知道。
5、Behind every successful man, there is a woman. And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. 每个成功男人的背后，都有一个女人。每个不成功男人的背后，都有两个女人。
6、Every man should marry. After all, happiness is not the only thing in life.
再快乐的单身汉迟早也会结婚，幸福不是永久的嘛。
五、英语笑话简短爆笑？
①
只剩一个引擎
A 747 was halfway across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker:"Attention，passengers. We have lost one of our engines，but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately， we will arrive an hour late as a result. "
一架747客机正跨越大西洋时，喇叭里传来了机长的声音:“旅客们请注意，我们四个引擎之中有一个丢失了。但利下的三个引擎会把我们带到伦敦的。不幸的是因此我们书晚到一小时。”
②
1、Teacher: whoever answers my next question, can go home.
老师：谁能回到我下一个问题，谁就可以回家了。
One boy throws his bag out the window.
一个小男孩把书包扔到窗外。
Teacher: who just threw that?!
老师：谁刚刚把书包扔出去了?
Boy: Me! I’m going home now.
男孩：我!我现在要回家了。
2、What dog can jump higher than a building?
什么狗比大楼跳的还高?
Anydog, buildings can't jump!
任何一只狗，大楼又跳不起来。
3、What has a head, a tail, and no body?
什么有头、有尾，但是没有身体?
A coin!
硬币。
4、What has one eye but cannot see?
什么有一只眼睛，却看不见?
六、英语搞笑段子？
While eating in a restaurant, I reprimanded my four-year-old son for speaking with his mouth full . "Mump umn Kmpfhm," was all I heard.
"Drew," I scolded, "no one can understand a word you're saying.
"He says he wants some ketchup," my husband said calmly .A woman sitting nearby leaned over and asked, "How in the world did you understand him?"
"I'm a dentist," my husband explained
I'm not addicted to Wechat!
You know, I just use it whenever I have time. Lunch time, break time, bed time, that time, this time, any time, all the time!
I hate two-faced people.It's so hard to decide which face to slap first.
When a woman says “WHAT?”, it’s not because she didn't hear you. She’s just giving you a chance to change what you said.
